261: How to deal with feeling overwhelmed

Posted on by Jeremy Godwin in Episodes, Weekly Episodes



Do you feel overwhelmed sometimes? If it feels like life is pulling you in too many directions, then this episode will help you to stop feeling overwhelmed and start feeling a lot calmer. So, let’s talk! 😃

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Show Notes

Episode Description:

Feeling overwhelmed at work, at home, or even just generally in life? Overwhelm can leave you stressed, anxious, and unsure where to start. In this episode, I’m sharing practical strategies for how to stop feeling overwhelmed and stressed, along with what to do if you’re overwhelmed and how to deal with overwhelming stress in ways that support your mental health and self improvement. Whether it’s work, relationships, or life’s challenges, you can learn to navigate stress and anxiety with greater calm and clarity. Ready to stop feeling overwhelmed and stressed? Then let’s talk!

Episode Release Date:

December 8th, 2024

Key Points:

  • What overwhelm is and why it happens
  • The impact of overwhelm on mental health and wellbeing
  • How feeling overwhelmed affects stress and anxiety
  • Practical steps to stop feeling overwhelmed
  • The importance of prioritising self-care when managing overwhelm  

Mentioned in this Episode (links open in new window):

Quote of the Week:

“When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond. That’s where your power is.” Unknown

Call to Action:

How do you deal with feeling overwhelmed? Share your thoughts in the Spotify comments section, or connect with me on Instagram @ltamentalhealth. Sign up for the weekly transcript and show notes at ltamh.com (or subscribe at the end of this page).

Next Week’s Episode:

Next week, I’ll be discussing how to create your future and take proactive steps towards building the life you want. Due for general release on December 15th, 2024 (one week earlier for Official Supporters on Patreon).

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TRANSCRIPT

How to deal with feeling overwhelmed

Do you feel overwhelmed sometimes? Does it feel like life is pulling you in too many directions? How do you respond when everything feels like it’s getting to be too much?

That’s what I’m talking about this week… so if you’re ready to learn how to take control when life feels chaotic and overwhelming, then let’s talk!

Hello and thanks for joining me for the Let’s Talk About Mental Health podcast, the independent show full of simple ideas for better mental health!

If you’re new here, hi! I’m Jeremy Godwin, I’m a writer and mental health counsellor, and this isn’t another show full of interviews or random opinions; each week I teach you practical ways to improve your mental wellbeing, based on quality research and my own experience of learning to live with anxiety and depression (after a breakdown in 2011 that completely changed my life).

This is Episode 261 and today I’m talking about dealing with feeling overwhelmed — what it means (and why it happens), how it affects your wellbeing, and what to do about it.

So, let’s talk!

***********

Have you ever felt like your to-do list has a mind of its own, multiplying faster than you can tackle it? Or do you sometimes feel like you’re juggling so many things that you’re just waiting for one (or more) of them to come crashing down? Or maybe you’ve even found yourself feeling completely overwhelmed by the nonsense going on in the world around you, or maybe closer to home?

Feeling overwhelmed is something we all face from time to time — it’s that heavy, suffocating sense that there’s just too much going on, and you’re not quite sure how to deal with it… or even where to start. 

But here’s the thing: overwhelm isn’t just about having too much on your plate; it’s also about how we respond when life feels chaotic (and I think we all know that life tends to be a big old chaotic mess quite a lot of the time!). Left unchecked, feelings of overwhelm can take a serious toll on your mental health, leaving you stressed, exhausted, and disconnected from the things that truly matter. 

The good news, however, is that you’re not powerless — far from it, in fact, and that’s what we’re going to be talking about in this episode, as well as how you can deal with overwhelm in a way that supports your mental health and wellbeing. Because while life can be full of challenges, learning how to manage overwhelm can help you navigate them with greater calm and clarity. By the end of this episode you’ll be ready to stop letting feelings of overwhelm call the shots, so you can start reclaiming your peace of mind!

First, let’s get ourselves on the same page with some definitions and let’s talk about… 

What does feeling overwhelmed mean?

So, broadly speaking, feeling overwhelmed is something we all experience at one time or another — it’s that sensation of having too much on your plate and not enough time, energy, or resources to handle it, and it might suddenly hit you like a tidal wave or it could creep in slowly over time. Life is full of responsibilities and pressures, and like a rollercoaster there can often be unexpected twists and turns (not to mention some kid losing their lunch over the edge of the ride!), and when those sorts of challenges build up beyond what you feel you can manage, overwhelm sets in. It’s a completely natural human reaction, and very common (so I promise, there’s nothing wrong with you if and when it happens!), but when it does take hold, it can be quite confronting and leave you feeling powerless and out-of-control, like you’re standing in quicksand and struggling to regain your footing before you find yourself being sucked down into the abyss.

Some common examples of what overwhelm feels like include: struggling to focus at work because of responsibilities weighing on your mind (whether that’s related to work stuff or personal things, like family responsibilities etc), trying to juggle what feels like a million and one tiny little tasks and errands until you’re convinced you need a personal assistant (and, hey, maybe you do!), or it could feel like you’re facing this massive problem that seems completely insurmountable and with no clear solution. You might also feel overwhelmed when you’re hit with big changes all at once — like a new job, new home, new worries — or when there’s a lot of stuff going on, like lots of bad news and uncertainty. 

So, the way that overwhelm shows up varies from person to person, but it often comes with a mix of physical and emotional symptoms. Maybe your chest feels tight, your thoughts are racing, or you can’t seem to make a decision about even the simplest things, like whether to have tea or coffee. You might feel irritable, teary, or emotionally drained, and there’s often a sense of hopelessness — like everything is just too much, and you just absolutely, categorically cannot (no matter how hard you try to can!). And let’s not forget some of the other common physical symptoms: headaches, exhaustion, that churning-gut thing that happens sometimes, or even that classic overwhelmed move, where you freeze and can’t do anything at all because your brain has officially checked out.

One of my go-to reactions to feelings of overwhelm is just to shut down and go into ‘avoidance mode’ — and avoidance mode is a very common reaction to overwhelm. When you feel like everything is just “too much!” your brain’s natural defence mechanism might kick in, urging you to retreat and avoid the source of stress. It’s a way of protecting yourself from feeling even more overloaded. However, while it can offer short-term relief, avoidance often makes things worse in the long run (and I say this to you from years of personal experience and a lot of therapy); tasks or issues that are left unaddressed tend to pile up, because they don’t just magically solve themselves, and so that ends up increasing your sense of overwhelm even further (turning it into a very vicious cycle that will have you rocking back and forth in a corner while you eat your hair). We’ll talk more about how to deal with this a bit later, but just in general I want to point out that it’s totally OK, there are plenty of things you can do to sort everything out, and it really comes down to starting small and building your progress over time. So, we’ll come back to that in a bit.

Now, from a mental health perspective, feeling overwhelmed can become a significant challenge when it’s ongoing or intense. It’s not just a fleeting feeling of stress but a state that can start to interfere with how you function day to day. You might find it harder to concentrate or enjoy activities that you usually love. Overwhelm can also ramp up feelings of anxiety or frustration, making your problems seem much bigger than they actually are. If that’s left unchecked, it can eventually lead to burnout, which is a very unpleasant state where your mind and body say, “That’s it—we’re done,” leaving you completely drained, and it can take a really long time to recover from that (which is why you’ll often hear me say that prevention is better than cure!).

In some cases, overwhelm can act as a warning sign that something needs to change. Think of it as your brain waving a massive red flag at you and shouting, “Oi, we’re heading up shit creek without a paddle here!” It’s your system telling you that you’ve taken on too much or that you’re not giving yourself the time and space you need to recharge. But here’s the thing: overwhelm isn’t a character flaw or a sign of failure. It’s simply a natural response to feeling stretched too far, and it’s a means of recognising that you need to take the first step towards regaining control (which I’ll come back to in a bit).

Now let’s talk about…

Why do we feel overwhelmed sometimes?

And, on a practical level, feeling overwhelmed means that your mental, emotional, or physical capacity is being stretched too thin. It’s kind-of like your brain’s operating system has way too many tabs open, and the whole thing is threatening to crash. Maybe it’s because of a relentless work deadline or non-stop demands at your job, or perhaps your personal to-do list is now so long that it’s turned into a novel, or maybe there’s a challenging life event or upsetting news that’s taking up all your headspace. For some of us, it’s the smaller, day-to-day stresses piling up, like forgetting to defrost dinner and then realising you’re out of milk — again. For others, it’s the bigger-picture stuff, like financial struggles, relationship issues, or coping with a major loss. Whatever the case may be, when overwhelm kicks in it can be hard to see past the weight of everything you’re thinking and feeling; it’s that old saying of not being able to see the forest for the trees, because you can feel like you’re caught up in the thick of everything and can’t see a way out. 

From a mental health perspective, overwhelm can have a huge impact on you. When your mind is constantly racing, or you feel like you’re drowning under the weight of responsibilities, it takes a pretty big toll on your emotional resilience. You might notice heightened anxiety, difficulty concentrating, or a sense of hopelessness. Over time, prolonged overwhelm can lead to exhaustion and burnout, where you feel emotionally and physically drained all or most of the time and you might even have very little energy to cope with day-to-day life, let alone challenges (when I had my breakdown, which was a combination of severe overwhelm, total burnout, and a lot of repressed emotions and trauma, I could barely even go to the supermarket to pick up a few groceries; whenever I did, I’d have to psyche myself up and then I’d come back so drained that I needed to have a good lie-down for at least five or six hours afterwards… so I can definitely say that I do not recommend burnout to anyone!). The other thing to bear in mind is that feeling overwhelmed can also make anxiety or depression symptoms a lot worse, turning what might start as a temporary state into something far more challenging to manage.

Taking action to address feelings of overwhelm is absolutely crucial, because it directly impacts your ability to function effectively and enjoy your life. Overwhelm isn’t just about feeling a bit stressed — it can leave you feeling incapacitated, unable to think clearly and disconnected from what matters most to you. When left unaddressed, it can snowball into bigger challenges, like chronic stress, burnout, or strained relationships. Taking steps to manage it allows you to regain control, make better decisions, and create space for what truly enriches your life. It’s not just about ‘getting things done’ — it’s about living in a way that feels balanced and sustainable.

So, how do you do that? Well, let’s first take a quick break to hear from the brands who help me create this show each week…

AD BREAK [Note: Ads do not play if you have Spotify Premium or are an Official Supporter tier Patreon supporter]

And welcome back! Now let’s get into the how-to part of today’s episode and let’s talk about… 

How to deal with overwhelm

Alright, let’s talk through some practical tips for how to deal with feeling overwhelmed, starting with… 

Slow down — and by that I mean to do what the Spice Girls instructed us all to do back in 1998 and stop right now, thank you very much… because you’ve got to slow it down and work through things gently, instead of trying to just push on with things, because you can’t fill from an empty cup. You can’t just keep on going and going and not expect that, eventually, you’re going to run out of steam… because you will, and we want to try to avoid it getting to that point because it’s a lot harder to come back from. So that leads to my next tip…

Pause and breathe — when you’re overwhelmed, your stress response kicks in, making it harder to think clearly or act rationally. Deep breathing helps calm your nervous system and it creates space to assess the situation more clearly. Try this: inhale deeply for four counts, hold for four, and exhale for six. Repeat this a few times. This simple act grounds you in the present moment and reminds you that you’re in control, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Next…

Write down your thoughts — if I’ve said it once in this podcast, I’ve said it a thousand times: write it out to get it out! When your thoughts feel like they’re going round in circles, writing them out gets them out of your head and it can help bring much greater clarity. This is often called a ‘brain dump’ — a way of transferring everything in your head onto paper so you can see it more clearly, which reduces the mental noise and gives you a chance to identify what’s truly important. Once you’ve written everything down, review your list and start to prioritise tasks or concerns. Speaking of, my next tip is…

Prioritise your tasks — overwhelm often comes from trying to do too much at once; prioritising helps you focus on what truly matters. After you’ve written down everything on your mind — yes, everything — then start to categorise tasks by urgency and importance, which allows you to see what needs immediate attention versus what can wait. And remember: if everything is urgent then nothing is urgent, so be realistic (and be ruthless if you need to). Next…

Break it down into smaller steps — big tasks or problems can often feel insurmountable, but breaking them down into smaller, manageable pieces can make them far less intimidating; it’s like having a micro-focus. For example, if you’re overwhelmed by a work project, identify the specific first step you can take — maybe it’s drafting an outline or emailing a colleague for their input. Then, what’s the next micro step, and the next? Write them down, and focus on completing one at a time (which I’ll come back to in a moment). First, just make sure you also factor in my next tip…

Focus on what you can control — and I feel like I say this one in most episodes, and with good reason: focusing on what is within your power (and letting go of the rest) helps you redirect your energy productively. For example, if you’re stressed about a tight deadline, focus on creating a plan for how you’ll tackle it step-by-step rather than worrying about the outcome, which helps you regain a sense of agency and control… both of which are incredibly empowering when everything feels chaotic! The same applies when there’s bad news; instead of getting caught up in the stuff you can’t control, what can you do to make a positive, tangible difference? OK, next…

Take small steps — so, to tackle whatever you’re dealing with, start small. Focus on just one thing you can do right now, however tiny, to regain a sense of control. Like I said before, microfocusing (by breaking tasks into manageable pieces and just tackling one thing at a time) really helps to reduce that paralysing ‘all-or-nothing’ feeling, and it creates momentum, shifting you from avoidance to action one step at a time (plus you usually start to feel a lot better about yourself once you’ve managed to conquer an item or two from your list!). Next…

Set realistic daily goals — instead of tackling a mountain of tasks, set two or three realistic goals for each day; this is what I do, and it helps you focus your energy and prevents you from feeling overwhelmed by an endless to-do list. At the start of your day, ask yourself, “What are the most important things I can achieve today?”; I do my daily list on a post-it note, so I have the satisfaction of chucking it out when I’m done. By narrowing your focus, you’re more likely to feel accomplished rather than defeated by the end of the day. Next…

Learn to say no — because saying ‘yes’ to too many things is a fast track to overwhelm. Saying no can be one of the most powerful tools for protecting your time and energy, and it doesn’t mean being rude or dismissive — it’s about setting boundaries that allow you to focus on what’s most important. For example, if you’re asked to take on extra responsibilities at work but already feel stretched thin, you might say, “I’d love to help, but I’m at capacity right now.” Saying no gets easier with practice and ensures you’re not taking on more than you can handle. I talked about how to say no without feeling guilty in Episode 258, so check that out for more advice. OK, next…

Ask for help — because you really don’t have to handle everything on your own. Asking for help can significantly reduce feelings of overwhelm, whether it’s delegating tasks at work or reaching out to a friend for support, and it lightens the load and reminds you that you’re not alone. Identify specific areas where you could use support and approach someone you trust. Be clear, direct, and specific about what you need — for example, ask, “Could you help me proofread this report?” or “Would you mind watching the kids for an hour so I can have a break?” OK, next…

Use the ‘two-minute rule’ — which is a great way to tackle small tasks that contribute to overwhelm. If something can be done in under two minutes — like responding to a quick email or tidying a small area — then do it immediately, because it prevents little things from piling up and creating unnecessary stress. Regularly scan your to-do list for quick wins; completing these tasks clears mental space and gives you a sense of accomplishment. Next…

Limit distractions — when you’re overwhelmed, things like constant notifications or cluttered spaces can make it even harder to focus, so create an environment that supports concentration by minimising distractions. Put your phone on silent (or ‘do not disturb’), close unnecessary tabs on your computer, or tidy your workspace. This helps reduce mental clutter and allows you to focus on the task at hand without being pulled in a million different directions, and you’ll be surprised at how much calmer you feel when your surroundings are less chaotic! OK, next… 

Create routines — routines create structure, which can be comforting when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Having a predictable plan for your mornings or evenings reduces the number of decisions you need to make, freeing up mental energy. For example, your morning routine could involve making your bed, having a cup of tea or coffee, and setting your intentions for the day. This type of predictability helps you feel more in control and less scattered. Next…

Take care of your physical needs — feeling overwhelmed is often made worse by neglecting your basic physical needs like sleep, nutrition, and hydration, because when your body is under-resourced, your ability to cope diminishes. Create a consistent sleep routine, fuel yourself with nutritious meals, and drink plenty of water throughout the day. Physical self-care helps stabilise your energy levels and improves your capacity to handle stress. Even small adjustments, like taking a short walk or eating a healthy snack, can make a huge difference. OK, next…

Schedule time to recharge — because you need to give yourself time to rest and recover; you can’t just go, go, go non-stop! Schedule breaks throughout your day, and actually take them — even if it’s just five minutes here and there to breathe or stretch. Plan regular downtime to do something you enjoy, like reading or spending time in nature. Recharging helps reset your mind and body, making you better equipped to handle challenges. Treat this time as non-negotiable — it’s not selfish, and it’s essential for your wellbeing. Next…

Reframe your perspective — which means looking at things in a more balanced way. Ask yourself, “Will this matter a year from now?” or “What’s the worst that could happen?” which helps you distinguish between true priorities and less critical concerns. Reframing doesn’t minimise the importance of tasks — it simply gives you a healthier way to approach them without being consumed by stress. Next…

Limit multitasking — because even though it might feel like you’re being productive, multitasking can actually increase feelings of overwhelm. Shifting between tasks divides your attention and makes everything take longer. Try focusing on one task at a time, giving it your full attention before moving on to the next, which reduces cognitive overload and allows you to complete tasks more efficiently.

And I think that, ultimately, you need to remember that it’s OK to feel overwhelmed and it doesn’t mean you’re failing; it just means you’re human. Just remind yourself every day — maybe even multiple times a day — to focus your energy on that specific day, instead of trying to fix everything all at once or think 15 steps ahead… it’s certainly been incredibly helpful in my case, and you’ll find it will help you to create some breathing space for yourself.

[Final Tips and Next Time]

Because when it comes to feeling overwhelmed and your mental health, what it all boils down to is this:

Dealing with overwhelm isn’t about magically erasing all your challenges or pretending everything is fine — it’s about recognising when you’re at capacity and taking steps to regain balance. Life will always throw us curveballs, but you have the power to decide how you respond. By acknowledging your feelings, and giving yourself the time and space to work through them, you can transform overwhelm into an opportunity for growth and resilience. Remember, it’s not about doing everything perfectly or all at once; it’s about taking things one step at a time and showing yourself kindness and compassion.

The choice is yours, as it is with all things related to your wellbeing… so, what choice will YOU make today? 

Each week I like to finish up by sharing a quote about the week’s topic, and I encourage you to take a few moments to really reflect on it and consider what it means to you. This week’s quote is by an unknown author, and it is:

“When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond. That’s where your power is.”

Unknown

Alright… that’s nearly it for this week!

Let me know, how do you deal with feeling overwhelmed? If you’re on Spotify you can share in the Comments section below, otherwise find me on Instagram @ltamentalhealth or comment on the transcript and show notes, which you can have delivered to your inbox each week; sign up at ltamh.com. 

And support my show on Patreon for early access to ad-free episodes and more; you’ll find it linked in the episode description.

Next week I’ll be talking about how to create your future; that will be out on December 15 and I hope you’ll join me for it! Hit ‘follow’ on your podcast service and turn on notifications so you never miss an episode. 

Thank you very much for joining me today. Look after yourself and make a conscious effort to share positivity and kindness out into the world… because you get back what you put out. Take care and talk to you next time!

Thank you very much for joining me today. Look after yourself and make a conscious effort to share positivity and kindness out into the world… because you get back what you put out. Take care and talk to you next time!

Let’s Talk About Mental Health is an independent program proudly produced by Reconnaissance Media. For more information visit reconnaissancemedia.com   

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Published by Jeremy Godwin

Writer and podcaster from Australia specialising in mental health and wellbeing. I write and host the weekly Let’s Talk About Mental Health podcast with listeners in over 170 countries worldwide.

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