Why should you talk about your mental health more? And how does talking improve your wellbeing? Well, if you’re ready to learn about the power of talking then… let’s talk! 😃
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Why should you talk about your mental health more? Why is there still so much stigma around talking about mental health, and how does talking improve your wellbeing?
Well, that’s what I’m talking about in this episode of Let’s Talk About Mental Health — the weekly podcast that makes better mental health simple.
Ready to talk about talking and mental health? Then, get comfortable and let’s talk!
Hello and welcome to Episode 243 of Let’s Talk About Mental Health, and thanks for joining me as I talk about the power of talking.
I’m Jeremy Godwin, and this isn’t your regular podcast full of interviews and random opinions. I’m a mental health counsellor and writer, and each week I look at one specific aspect of mental health and I teach you simple and practical ways to improve your wellbeing, based on quality research and my own experience of learning to live with anxiety and depression after a breakdown in 2011 that changed my life.
In this episode I’ll be talking about what talking means in mental health terms, why talking is critical for better mental health, and how to talk about mental health challenges.
So, let’s talk!
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Are you talking about your mental health enough? If not, why not? I mean, sure, defining what ‘enough’ is will always be a bit subjective, but I’m going to wager that there are plenty of us who could really benefit from talking about our issues and challenges a lot more… and today I’m going to be exploring the ins and outs of talking and mental health.
Now, I might as well point out upfront that it feels like I’m probably going to be saying the word ‘talk’ a lot today (and I already tend to say it a lot anyway, since it’s part of the title of my podcast!), but here’s the thing: talking plays an absolutely crucial role in taking care of your mental health, and talking therapies are one of the main forms of treatment for mental health issues. Why? Well, to answer that question we need only look to none other than the Australian princess of pop, Kylie Minogue, who told us 30 years ago in her classic track Confide in Me, “…we all have our cross to bear, but in the name of understanding now, our problems should be shared…”
So, before I get carried away with other random pop culture references that anyone born after Windows 95 came out will probably never understand, let’s first get ourselves on the same page with some definitions and let’s talk about…
What talking means in mental health terms
At its core, what we’re talking about here is opening up about issues you might be dealing with, and sharing your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with someone else rather than keeping them to yourself; that could mean talking to a friend, a family member, a partner, your manager, a trusted colleague, a teacher if you’re still at school, or a professional like a counsellor or therapist.
When you talk about what’s on your mind, you’re giving voice to your inner world, and this act of sharing can bring you a sense of relief and also validation. It’s like shining a light on the dark corners of your mind, making the unknown known, and the overwhelming more manageable.
Practically speaking, talking is about having honest and open conversations. It means finding the words to express how you’re feeling and what you’re going through, and giving yourself permission to speak out about things… even if it might feel a bit scary. Talking might start with saying something as simple as, “Hey, I’ve been feeling a bit off lately,” or “Can we talk about something that’s been on my mind?” From there, it involves actively participating in the conversation and being present, whether you’re the one sharing or the one being shared with.
When we think about talking in a general context, it’s about communication. We communicate daily, through our words, our actions, our gestures, and even our silence. Effective communication means being able to articulate your thoughts clearly and also being able to listen to and understand others; it’s about both expressing yourself and engaging with others in a meaningful way.
In a mental health context, talking takes on a slightly-different but deeply important role. Here, it’s not just about communicating; it’s also about therapeutic dialogue. So, what does that mean? Well, it’s about talking therapies, also known as psychotherapy or counselling, which are structured ways of helping people manage emotional difficulties, life challenges, and mental health issues. These types of therapies provide a safe and confidential space where you can talk with an objective and experienced professional about your life, and about anything that might be confusing, painful, or uncomfortable (it’s the type of work that I do as a counsellor, outside of this podcast!).
So, in this context the act of talking isn’t about just venting or complaining so you can get things off your chest; it’s a guided process that helps you understand yourself better, gain new perspectives, and develop strategies to cope with life’s challenges. It’s a collaborative effort where you’re supported by a professional who helps you navigate your thoughts and feelings, leading to greater self-awareness and healing. The important thing to remember is that the essence of talking about mental health is rooted in connection and understanding.
With that in mind, now let’s talk about…
Why talking is critical for better mental health
And it’s enormously important because, by talking about our mental health we break down the barriers of isolation and silence… both of which can make your issues feel a lot worse than they are. And, as I have often said in this podcast, “the more we talk about it, the easier it gets…” — because the simple act of talking can open doors to support, solutions, and a healthier mindset.
Talking about challenges you’re dealing with leads to connection, understanding, and resolution. When you talk about what’s bothering you, you’re not only sharing your thoughts and feelings but also inviting others to share theirs, which can lead to deeper relationships and a sense of belonging; I often get feedback from listeners saying it just helps to know they’re not alone in dealing with particular mental health challenges. Talking breaks down barriers and stigmas, and it helps to foster a community where people feel heard and valued.
In general, talking helps to clarify misunderstandings, resolve conflicts, and build trust. When you articulate your thoughts, you’re not only making sense of them yourself but also allowing others to understand your perspective instead of keeping things bottled up. This can lead to more effective collaboration, whether that’s in your personal relationships, at work, or in broader social contexts. It’s through talking that we find common ground and create shared understanding, which is essential for any successful relationship.
When it comes to mental health, talking takes on an even more critical role. Talking about your mental health struggles can bring a tremendous sense of relief. When you voice your concerns, you validate your feelings and experiences… and this act of validation can reduce the burden of carrying these issues alone, and it can be the first step towards healing.
I will never, ever forget the relief I felt when I finally talked to my doctor about what I was going through in early 2012. I had been going through a total breakdown for several months, since about late September in 2011, and I was in full denial about everything because I thought it was weakness. Eventually my situation became worse — much worse — and I was genuinely terrified that I was going to seriously harm myself, and so I forced myself to tell my doctor what was going on and he was amazing. Absolutely amazing. The kindness and compassion he showed me made me burst into tears, and it was him and the psychologist I ended up seeing who managed to get me through the severe depression and anxiety I ended up experiencing for several years, and who also inspired me to want to work in the mental health space once I started to recover (so you can thank them for this podcast!). Talking about what I was going through was absolutely the first step — and the most difficult-yet-important step — in my long journey of healing, and I’m grateful every day that I somehow managed to fight through the weight of everything I was going through and tell another person what I was feeling, because it saved my life.
Mental health issues often thrive in silence and isolation. By talking about them, you take away their power and you discover that there are (thankfully) lots of different ways to treat them… but you won’t know if you don’t speak up. The more you talk about it, the easier it will get to find the help and support you need.
When you talk openly about your mental health — the good, the bad, and the ugly — you help to break the stigmas around mental illness and you create a more open environment where other people feel safe to share their struggles as well, all of which can lead to a more supportive and understanding community. When we talk openly about mental health issues, we normalise them, making it easier for everyone to seek help if and when they need it.
In a therapeutic context, talking is the foundation of many mental health treatments. Counsellors and therapists use talking therapies to help you explore your thoughts and emotions, understand your mental health issues, and develop coping strategies in a safe, objective, and judgement-free space. It’s a structured form of talking that can lead to significant improvements in your mental health and overall wellbeing, and it’s through these types of guided conversations that you can gain clarity and find pathways to recovery.
Through talking, you can gain greater self-awareness. By verbalising your thoughts and feelings, you can start to identify patterns, triggers, and underlying issues that you might not have noticed otherwise, and this type of self-awareness is crucial for both your personal growth and your mental health management. Also, discussing your problems with someone else can lead to new insights and solutions, because sometimes just the act of talking about a problem can help you see it from a different perspective, making it easier to find a resolution.
Ultimately, talking about issues and challenges you might be dealing with often brings a sense of relief and liberation. I know that, for me, my regular sessions with my own therapist are invaluable because they help me to process through things and to manage my emotions more effectively. When you express your thoughts and feelings, you’re not just releasing the emotional pressure; you’re also gaining clarity, and it can feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders and you’re not so alone. You might experience a sense of connection and support, knowing that someone else understands what you’re going through (or at least is aware of what you’re dealing with).
On the other hand, avoiding issues or not speaking up can lead to a build-up of stress and anxiety. When you keep your struggles bottled up, they can feel overwhelming and unmanageable and avoidance can result in feelings of isolation and loneliness, as you might think that nobody else can relate to your experiences. Over time, this can take a toll on both your mental and physical health, leading to increased stress, sleep disturbances, and even physical symptoms like headaches or stomach issues.
When you talk about whatever you’re dealing with, or the burdens you’re carrying, you can begin to free yourself from their weight.
So then, how do you do that? Well, let’s first take a quick break to hear from the brands who help me create this show each week…
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And welcome back! Now let’s get into the how-to part of today’s episode and let’s talk about…
How to talk about mental health challenges
OK, first, think about what you want and need to say — there’s no rush when it comes to talking about your mental health (except to say don’t bottle things up for ages, because that can often make your situation feel worse). Take some time to gather your thoughts and feelings before initiating a conversation with someone you trust, which allows you to feel more prepared and less anxious about the discussion. Set aside some quiet time to reflect on what you want to say and how you want to say it, which helps ensure that the conversation is thoughtful and meaningful. Next…
Write it down first — if talking about your mental health feels too difficult, try writing down your thoughts and feelings first which can help organise your emotions and make it easier to articulate them when you’re ready to talk. Writing allows you to reflect on your feelings without the pressure of an immediate response. Keep a journal or write a letter to the person you want to talk to (that you don’t have to send!). Once you have your thoughts on paper, you can share them directly or use them as a guide during your conversation. OK, next…
Identify who you want to talk to — choosing the right person to confide in is crucial when talking about your mental health. Look for someone you trust, who listens without judgment, and who has shown empathy in the past; that could be a close friend, a family member, or a professional like a counsellor. The right person can provide a safe space for you to open up, which is essential for effective communication. Try reflecting on your relationships and considering who has been supportive and understanding in the past and start with someone you feel comfortable with, which makes the process of sharing your thoughts and feelings less daunting. Next…
Choose the right time and place for you — selecting an appropriate time and place to have a conversation about your mental health can make a big difference; a packed train during rush hour will feel far less relaxing that a quiet and private setting where you can talk without interruptions, so choose a time when both you and the other person aren’t rushed or preoccupied. A calm and relaxed environment facilitates better communication and understanding. Try scheduling a specific time to talk or suggesting a quiet place, like a park or a cosy corner at home. And make sure you allow enough time to discuss your feelings without pressure, which makes the conversation more meaningful and productive. OK, next…
Be honest and direct — while it might be tempting to downplay your feelings, or mask them with humour, being direct about what you’re experiencing allows others to understand and support you better… and it avoids misunderstandings, and ensures that your true feelings are acknowledged. Clearly state how you feel and why, without sugar-coating or minimising your experience. For example, saying “I’ve been feeling really anxious lately and it’s affecting my sleep” provides clear information that others can respond to appropriately. OK, next…
Start small — if the idea of discussing your mental health feels overwhelming, begin with small steps. You don’t need to dive into the deepest parts of your experience right away. Start by sharing a little about how you’ve been feeling recently, or mentioning a specific incident that has affected you. This helps to gradually build your comfort and confidence in talking about your mental health. If you don’t feel ready to share too much, try casually bringing up how your day has been or mentioning that you’ve been feeling a bit off. Over time, these small conversations can pave the way for deeper discussions. Next…
Use “I” statements — so, using “I” statements can help you communicate your feelings more effectively and reduce the chances of the other person feeling defensive. Phrases like “I feel overwhelmed” or “I’ve been struggling with…” focus on your experience, rather than blaming or accusing someone else. This approach centres the conversation on your emotions and experiences, making it easier for others to understand and empathise with you. Practice this by reflecting on your feelings and starting your sentences with “I feel…” or “I’ve noticed…” OK, next…
Set boundaries — it’s important to communicate your needs clearly when talking about your mental health, and to let others know what you’re comfortable talking about. This ensures that the conversation remains respectful and supportive, and it protects your emotional wellbeing. Do this by stating your boundaries upfront, such as “I’m OK talking about my anxiety, but I’m not ready to discuss the specifics just yet.” Setting boundaries allows you to have control over the conversation and to ensure that it’s a positive experience for you. Alright, so my next tip is…
Normalise the conversation — one of the best ways to talk about your mental health more openly is to treat discussions about mental health like you would any other aspect of health, like physical fitness or nutrition. This helps reduce the stigma and makes it easier for everyone to talk about their experiences. You can do this by casually bringing up mental health in everyday conversations with friends and family, sharing articles or information you find interesting, and being open about your own mental health journey. Normalising the topic helps create a culture where mental health is openly discussed and understood. As well as sharing your own experiences, make it a habit to regularly check in with family, friends, and loved ones about how they’re doing. Asking simple questions like, “How have you been feeling lately?” or “Is there anything on your mind that you want to talk about?” can open the door for meaningful conversations; this shows that you care and also encourages others to talk about their mental health. Here in Australia, we have R U OK? Day, a national day of action dedicated to reminding everyone that any day is a good day to ask, “Are you OK?” and support people who might be struggling with life; you can apply this in your own life by making a habit of asking those around you if they’re OK throughout the year. When you ask someone if they’re OK, listen actively and without judgement. Show empathy and offer your support, whether that means just listening, providing a comforting presence, or helping them find professional help if they need it, which builds trust and makes it more likely that others will open up about their struggles in the future. Next…
Use support groups — so, support groups can be a hugely valuable resource for talking about your mental health because they provide a safe space where you can share your experiences with others who understand what you’re going through, reducing feelings of isolation and offering a sense of community and solidarity. Try researching local or online support groups that align with your specific needs or interests. OK, next…
Seek professional help — sometimes, talking to friends or family isn’t enough, and that’s OK; it’s hard for them to be objective, because they care about you, so seeking professional help from a counsellor or therapist can give you the support and guidance you need. Professionals are trained to help you navigate your mental health challenges in a structured and confidential environment, so you receive the right kind of support tailored to your needs. Research local mental health professionals, ask for recommendations, or explore online therapy options to find someone to talk with.
Summary and Close-out
Because when it comes to talking and mental health, what it all boils down to is this:
Talking about your mental health can be a transformative experience, opening doors to greater understanding, support, and healing. By normalising these conversations, and making them a regular part of your life, you not only help yourself but you also create a more compassionate and supportive community for everyone around you. So many of us face mental health challenges, and when we choose to speak up we’re making it easier for everyone… because the more we talk about it, the easier it gets.
The choice is yours, as it is with all things related to your wellbeing… so, what choice will YOU make today?
Each week I like to finish up by sharing a quote about the week’s topic, and I encourage you to take a few moments to really reflect on it and consider what it means to you. This week’s quote is by Glenn Close, and it is:
“What mental health needs is more sunlight, more candour, and more unashamed conversation.”
Glenn Close
Alright… that’s nearly it for this week.
What does talking mean to you? If you’re on Spotify scroll down and share in the Comments section below, otherwise let me know on Instagram @ltamentalhealth or comment on the transcript, which you can have delivered to your inbox each week; sign up at ltamh.com or use the link in the episode description. And for more tips follow my other Instagram account @itsjeremygodwin, plus become a paid supporter on Patreon for early access to ad-free episodes of all of my podcasts.
Next week I’ll be talking about assumptions. Have you ever wondered how jumping to conclusions might be shaping your reality and relationships? There are lots of hidden pitfalls in making assumptions, and they can wreak absolute havoc on your mental health… so next time I’ll be exploring how to navigate life with a clearer and more mindful perspective. I’ll be talking about what assumptions are (and what they’re not), why assumptions are harmful to your mental health, and how to let go of assumptions.
That episode will be released on the 11th of August, 2024, and I hope you’ll join me for it! Hit ‘follow’ on your podcast service and press the bell to turn on notifications so you never miss an episode.
Thank you very much for joining me today. Look after yourself and make a conscious effort to share positivity and kindness out into the world, because you get back what you put out. Take care and talk to you next time!
Let’s Talk About Mental Health is an independent program proudly produced by Reconnaissance Media. For more information visit reconnaissancemedia.com
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Find more content at www.letstalkaboutmentalhealth.com.au
Let’s Talk About Mental Health.
Making Mental Health Simple.
The information provided in this episode is for general awareness on the topic and does not constitute advice. You should consult a doctor and/or mental health professional if you’re struggling with your mental health and wellbeing. You’ll find additional information on the Resources page of this website.
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